Are You Ready for Some "Football"?

The Cleveland Browns are a long way away from the team that came in 2nd in the AFC North and went 7-7 in a season that included a 31-21 win over the New York Jets on September 21, 1970, marking the debut of Monday Night Football. Technically, they're a completely different team from the very bottom-up, but that's yet another crude reminder of Cleveland football anguish best saved for another day. So as the 1-7 Browns prepare to play host to the AFC North rival Baltimore Ravens, they may want to also ask themselves, "does anybody really care"?

One week ago, the Browns were facing a blackout due to thier fans simply refusing to buy tickets to the game, justifiably fed up with an organization that has performed consistently poor over the last decade. A blackout, NFL? Please, don't do Cleveland any favors. After all, who doesn't want to see this completely and utterly inept offense with a starting quarterback that has been yanked more times than a businessman in Taipei go against one of the better defenses in the NFL even though they've dropped four of five games since defeating Cleveland September 27?

And who isn't interested in seeing exactly how the 31st-ranked defense in the NFL will match up against the league's 9th-ranked offense now that two of the Brown's better linebacking assets (D. Jackson, E. Barton) are out for the rest of the season? And, of course, who can't wait to see if this is the game Eric Mangini's big head finally explodes into a million pieces of confetti while all of the 54-man roster sings George Michael's "Freedom" in perfect unison?

Yes, these are storylines on the field for Mangini's circus that has somehow come of the 2009 Brown's season, which is nothing short of a joke, a travesty, and a staunch boot to the balls (or ladypart) of every Browns fan across the globe. Off the field, it is even worse. Punches being thrown in the lockerroom amidst a rookie hazing prank, non-mandatory busrides ultimately ending up with players being alienated, exorbitant fines for a water bottle being taken from a hotel minibar, league veterans calling out the coach for any number of different reasons, and an unprecedented amount of fines handed down by NFL officials to a head coach. Embarassing, inexcusable and downright disgusting. I only imagine Randy Lerner red-faced standing in a doorway while Magnini snags his pants at the waist, pulls them down to his ankles and gives him a quick shove over Rob Daboll, who's squated behind Lerner in a four-point stance shouting "Great prank, Mangenius!" dying in laughter. Meanwhile, Rob Ryan is smoking grass blasting Bob Segar records in the next room over while the players and faculty look down the hall asking each other in loud whispers "who the hell is in charge around here!?!"

And with such excitement around Berea, the Browns take the field on this Monday night for a 29th time in overall history and for the fifth time since their return to the NFL in 1999 - 3 of which occuring over the span of just the last year. And what have football fans across the nation had to endure in that ten year span? Well, dear reader, let's take a brief journey through time:


December 8, 2003 - St. Louis at Cleveland (L, 26-20): I was at this game. It was a freezing dry evening and my first experience in physically participating in a nationally televised football game. For the Brown's return to Monday Night Football since 1995, they laid the egg that put St. Louis back into the 2003 playoff race. Starter Kelly Holcomb was pulled at halftime after giving a poor performance which included two interceptions that resulted in 14 points for the Rams. Tim Couch started the second half but came up short after he fumbled the ball allowing St. Louis to recover and run out the clock for the win. As I write this I realize the more things change, the more they stay the same.

October 13, 2008 - New York Giants at Cleveland (W, 35-14): Who could forget this game? The single most complete game the Browns have put together in at least ten years -- defeating the reigning Super Bowl champs, the New York Giants. Braylon Edwards was actually catching the ball, Anderson finished 18-29 for 310 yards and 2 TD, and cornerback Eric Wright had an interception returned 94-yards for a touchdown. The Browns went without a punt in a game for the first time since 1995, had their first Monday Night win since 1993, compiled a total of 455 offensive yards, and snapped the Giants' 11-game streak of road wins which was tied for the second-longest in NFL history. This was to be the coming-of-age game for a young, talented football team with the foundation laid for the future and the turnaround point for not only the 2008 season, but the franchise as a whole. Ah, memories!

November 17, 2008 - Cleveland at Buffalo (W, 29-27): In a performance featuring two lackluster teams and the Browns almost losing yet again due to a fourth quarter meltdown, Cleveland pulled one out on a 56-yard field goal by Phil Dawson. The Browns improved to 4-6 on the season with Brady Quinn at the helm for his second career start and the win was a dim ray of hope for a season that was beginning to look doomed. Trent Edwards' three interceptions of the first quarter made the Browns look at least appealing to the casual viewer.

December 15, 2008 - Cleveland at Philadelphia: (L, 10-30): By December 2008, Cleveland's season was basically over as they limped to the finish line at 4-12 and last in the AFC North. The Monday Night game against the Eagles was the fourth consecutive loss the Browns endured and it wasn't even close. Ken Dorsey, the 2003 Fiesta Bowl QB from the University of Miami who started the game in place of injured Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn, was intercepted twice and became the sixth Browns quarterback to start the last six Monday Night games (Kosar 1993, Zeier 1995, Holcomb 2003, Anderson 2008, Quinn 2008, Dorsey 2008).


With the Browns holding on to a .500 record over the last ten years on Monday Night, the God's aren't necessarily against Cleveland -- not in that regard, at least. But for a team that has gone from bad, to worse, to bad, to promising, to horrific, how many people in America really want to see this team on national television -- again? As a FAN, I get sick watching them on a lazy Sunday afternoon and couldn't even imagine watching this team as a casual football fan. Of course, the Browns have one of the largest fanbases worldwide, but how much longer can anyone truly expect that to last? Unless you are a Browns fan, do you really care to see this team? And even as a Browns fan, how far to your wit's end do you have to be until it just doesn't matter anymore?

The sad truth is, there is no light at the end of the tunnel for the Cleveland Browns. The coaching staff is in shambles, the only building blocks of the franchise are an offensive tackle, maybe a nose tackle and a kick returner with questionable receiving capabilities, and an owner who has proven time and time again he doesn't have the capacity to be a professional (American) football organization owner. So, if you do care enough to take the time to watch tonight's game, try your best to enjoy it. It very well may be the last Monday Night Browns game you see for quite a while.